That’s shiny in the literal sense, not in the Serenity sense…
I’ve never had a tattoo. Often thought about it. Even know where I’d like one. Just never quite found a design that was uniquely me and not completely cheesy (you’ll never know how near I was to getting a Prydonian Chapter insignia on my shoulder blade). And somebody has beaten me to this:
(Actually, aren’t they a little high?)
In which case these these Don Ed Hardy trainers – based on the designs of the guy who was one of the first tattoo artists to incorporate Japanese imagery into his work in the ’70s – are the nearest I’m going to get.
Thing is, Japanese-themed tattoos can be very cool. These trainers are not.
It’s not so much the imagery (which is a tad over-the-top, but still pretty good) or the slightly camp neon blue, boating shoes, extraneous lacing affair going on.
It’s the fact that they’re so gorram shiny!
Honestly, these photos don’t show ’em at their shiniest. They are really plasticky, like they’re made from melted vinyl, and very, very, very shiny. And when you walk in them the ends of the laces bounce off the shiny crust making a “thunk, thunk, thunk” noise.
I’d probably be okay with them if they were canvas and didn’t have the strange sailor boy lacing (are they safety ropes for hamsters to hang on to?).
But as they are? Well, as Mal Reynolds might say, “This here’s a recipe for unpleasantness.”
And I have to ware them all day. That thunking is going to drive me mad!
So please, donate a fiver to the charity to make it all worthwhile.
Current total: £565
• Remember this is all for charity, so any pennies or pounds you can spare PLEASE DONATE BY CLICKING HERE.
• Follow me on Twitter to make sure you see what trainers I’m wearing each day.
• If you have any trainers you could donate (either on loan or old pairs you’re getting rid of) which are size 9 (ish – I can do anything from 8 to 10) contact me at email@example.com so I can arrange collection.
• Please, please, please leave comments below! I’m after ideas for mini-challenges, future photoshoots and how I can find enough pairs of trainers!